Weakness > Strength

Together we are stronger in our weaknesses than we are apart in our strengths.

I heard this on the radio the other day and it's really been resonating in my heart. Together we are stronger in our weaknesses than we are apart in our strengths. It makes sense, and it may be one of those things that you read and say "oh, isn't that nice." and then you move on. That's all I did at first.

I heard someone say the phrase on KLove, and I just kind of shrugged my shoulders and changed the station. I really hate listening to people I don't know talk in the car. Talk radio physically makes me angry. I can't tell you why, but over the years I've just learned to change the station when someone is talking or when there's a commercial running about how cheap a new truck is or how I can go tanning really cheap somewhere.

Together we are stronger in our weaknesses than we are apart in our strengths....

A few months ago I published a post called "My Deepest Confession." I spent about forty-five minutes putting it together, and it was unlike anything I've ever published before. I posted nearly every selfie of myself that I've taken in the last year, and then briefly told a story of struggling with body image issues.

My story is not uncommon. It's like that of many girls strewn about the world. You look in the mirror, you don't like what you see, you struggle to change those physical qualities, you become discouraged, and then try to take matters into your own hands. Some girls cut, some girls don't eat, some girls eat too much and make themselves sick, and some just binge. I experimented with a little bit of each of those things. This phase of my life was (thankfully) short lived. It's not something I talk about often, and it's not something I like to go into detail about.

I shared a brief glimpse into this part of my life, and was brave enough to share it on another social media platform. I didn't expect much, it only took me about an hour to throw together one afternoon when the particular topic was on my heart. Within 48 hours it had been shared a little less than a dozen times and had over 200 page views. In the big scheme of life I know that isn't very many, but it's more than I've ever had before.  My inbox on Facebook and my text messages were overflowing. I received message after message with people saying things like "Wow. I can't believe you feel that way. I've felt like that my entire life. Thanks for being brave enough to post that." And time after time I just stared in disbelief.

At church the following week I had an older woman in our congregation approach me with tears in her eyes and told me that she understood where I was coming from and how she never wants anyone to feel the way she had felt growing up. She gave me some words of encouragement, hugged me tightly, and walked away. A few hours later another woman approached me and told me that she wished her granddaughters could grasp and understand what I was saying about inner beauty.

That post has come up several times over the last several weeks and each time I end up having profound conversations with those around me. I didn't expect that at ALL.

Together we are stronger in our weaknesses than we are apart in our strengths.






Do you want to know why I think people shared and liked "My Deepest Confession" more than anything I've ever written before? Do you want to know why I think people still come up to me and bring it up in conversation? (Even if you don't...I'm going to tell you anyway so brace yourself...)

People didn't like it because it was well written. People didn't like it because I posted 7392018462394 pictures of myself.

It was one of the most transparent and honest things I've ever written, and I think people liked it because it was real.

And when I realized that, it really tripped me out. I've spent a majority of my life trying to filter that "realness" when I'm around others. Surely people don't want to hear about the unfiltered "real." Right?

Surely people don't want me to admit that I struggle with insecurity and anxiety. People don't want to read a blog post about someone who's struggling or being a regular human being. Nobody wants that.

Seriously folks, I've been racking my brain for weeks trying to figure this one out. Why on earth would such a small post be full of so many emotions? Because I was honest. And the more I thought about that, the more I realized that in my own life, when I look back and consider the moments where people impacted me the most, I was drawn to (and often overwhelmed by) their transparency.

Together we are stronger in our weaknesses than we are apart in our strengths.

On a whim, I opened up and shared a weakness that I have. Not expecting a thing to come of it. But the Lord used that weakness, united a bunch of people, and He used many people to encourage me as well! People opened up to one another, and I think several personal relationships of my own were made stronger.

Together we are stronger in our weaknesses than we are apart in our strengths.

Thank God.

Millenial Women

Recently I was essentially asked the question "What do millennial women need from the church?" and my answer actually surprised myself. 

I racked my brain for days, praying and considering my answer very carefully before I threw anything out onto the table, and here's what I came up with:

What do women my age need from the church?

We're in our early twenties. We're trying to figure out how to work, how to go to school, how to stick to a budget, how to be in a serious relationship, how to buy a car, how to file our taxes for the first time, how to vote, how to apply for student loans, how to pay back student loans, how to pay for textbooks, how to balance friends and study time, how to balance time with God and time in other things. All we do all the time is try to figure out what we're doing next. We're striving to be independent and realizing that sometimes we don't want to 'grow up' quite as much as we thought we did. We change our mind more than we change our clothes. We change majors, we change directions, we change colleges, we change relationships, and we change ALL. THE. TIME. We're busy and we stay busy. There are girls in my Sunday School class who work 2 or 3 jobs throughout the week, go to night school, do volunteer work, take more than 15 hours of classes, are involved with Greek Life or other extracurriculars and are constantly on the go.  

I know the argument is "Millennials complain too much. They don't know busy!!! Wait until they have In laws and grandparents and babies whose schedules they're juggling, or wait until they have real jobs in the real world with real conflicts." Ok. Fine. That's a valid argument. But the counter argument that I always use is that any super mom or super adult who can do all of those things had to learn at some point. Generally, they learned in college just like we are. We're constantly learning. Learning how to be functional, upstanding members of society, learning what our gender role in society is or is not, learning how to be a successful student, learning how to be better daughters or friends, learning how to be a child of God, learning what it means to balance responsibilities, learning information in class, learning from our mistakes, learning from mistakes of others, learning learning learning all the time.

I can't speak on behalf of all women my age, but if I could pick anything that I need from church, then I would say the following is the most important...

I need for women in the church to tell me they're praying for me, and not belittle me when my only prayer request is "school."

When a college student, any college student, says they want you to pray for "school" 98% of the time we don't even want you to pray for our grades!!! 

I want prayers that ask the Lord to grant me patience and love and kindness on dealing with the class full of atheists that I have to go sit in when I have my geology lab on Tuesday mornings. 

I want prayers for words of wisdom on how to respond to my friend who just told me she's pregnant and getting her third abortion. 

I want prayers for self-control and discernment when facing peer pressure. 

I want prayers of faith and reassurance when I look at a bank account with $1.72 in my checking account.

I want prayers on what God's direction in my life is going to be. 

I want prayers on how to deal with shame and doubt. And there are dozens upon dozes of other things that come to mind when someone my age says to pray for "school."

Family conflicts that arise because of school, professors, car issues, dorm mate probs, party dilemmas, facing drugs and alcohol, and I'm sure the list goes on and on.

 "School" or "College" as a prayer request is soooooooooooo much deeper than just our grades, and I don't think people understand it.

That's all I can think of right now, but that's the biggest thing.

Ya'll. Millennials get thrown a ton of shade for being lazy, self absorbed, cognitively-delayed individuals with no respect for others  or spaces around them. We are constantly told that we are uneducated, oblivious, unprofessional, entitled, ungrateful, arrogant people who will "one day ruin what was once a great country." I agree with it! I think my generation is absolutely pathetic at times too, but we aren't the worst thing ever. We aren't stupid. We aren't all hipsters. We don't all smoke recreational drugs or drink excessively at parties. We are not a disgrace.

We are a group of passionate people who can set their mind to anything they wish to accomplish. We are creative and critical thinkers. We are effective communicators. We have high expectations. We are resourceful.

We're just like you were when you were our age: young, excited, & full of life!

So pray for us. Pray with us. Build relationships with us if you want to, and we'll be way more likely to listen to you. Buy us a cup of $2.00 coffee during finals week and we'll love you forever. Love us. Be patient with us. We're still learning just like you were once.