Millenial Women

Recently I was essentially asked the question "What do millennial women need from the church?" and my answer actually surprised myself. 

I racked my brain for days, praying and considering my answer very carefully before I threw anything out onto the table, and here's what I came up with:

What do women my age need from the church?

We're in our early twenties. We're trying to figure out how to work, how to go to school, how to stick to a budget, how to be in a serious relationship, how to buy a car, how to file our taxes for the first time, how to vote, how to apply for student loans, how to pay back student loans, how to pay for textbooks, how to balance friends and study time, how to balance time with God and time in other things. All we do all the time is try to figure out what we're doing next. We're striving to be independent and realizing that sometimes we don't want to 'grow up' quite as much as we thought we did. We change our mind more than we change our clothes. We change majors, we change directions, we change colleges, we change relationships, and we change ALL. THE. TIME. We're busy and we stay busy. There are girls in my Sunday School class who work 2 or 3 jobs throughout the week, go to night school, do volunteer work, take more than 15 hours of classes, are involved with Greek Life or other extracurriculars and are constantly on the go.  

I know the argument is "Millennials complain too much. They don't know busy!!! Wait until they have In laws and grandparents and babies whose schedules they're juggling, or wait until they have real jobs in the real world with real conflicts." Ok. Fine. That's a valid argument. But the counter argument that I always use is that any super mom or super adult who can do all of those things had to learn at some point. Generally, they learned in college just like we are. We're constantly learning. Learning how to be functional, upstanding members of society, learning what our gender role in society is or is not, learning how to be a successful student, learning how to be better daughters or friends, learning how to be a child of God, learning what it means to balance responsibilities, learning information in class, learning from our mistakes, learning from mistakes of others, learning learning learning all the time.

I can't speak on behalf of all women my age, but if I could pick anything that I need from church, then I would say the following is the most important...

I need for women in the church to tell me they're praying for me, and not belittle me when my only prayer request is "school."

When a college student, any college student, says they want you to pray for "school" 98% of the time we don't even want you to pray for our grades!!! 

I want prayers that ask the Lord to grant me patience and love and kindness on dealing with the class full of atheists that I have to go sit in when I have my geology lab on Tuesday mornings. 

I want prayers for words of wisdom on how to respond to my friend who just told me she's pregnant and getting her third abortion. 

I want prayers for self-control and discernment when facing peer pressure. 

I want prayers of faith and reassurance when I look at a bank account with $1.72 in my checking account.

I want prayers on what God's direction in my life is going to be. 

I want prayers on how to deal with shame and doubt. And there are dozens upon dozes of other things that come to mind when someone my age says to pray for "school."

Family conflicts that arise because of school, professors, car issues, dorm mate probs, party dilemmas, facing drugs and alcohol, and I'm sure the list goes on and on.

 "School" or "College" as a prayer request is soooooooooooo much deeper than just our grades, and I don't think people understand it.

That's all I can think of right now, but that's the biggest thing.

Ya'll. Millennials get thrown a ton of shade for being lazy, self absorbed, cognitively-delayed individuals with no respect for others  or spaces around them. We are constantly told that we are uneducated, oblivious, unprofessional, entitled, ungrateful, arrogant people who will "one day ruin what was once a great country." I agree with it! I think my generation is absolutely pathetic at times too, but we aren't the worst thing ever. We aren't stupid. We aren't all hipsters. We don't all smoke recreational drugs or drink excessively at parties. We are not a disgrace.

We are a group of passionate people who can set their mind to anything they wish to accomplish. We are creative and critical thinkers. We are effective communicators. We have high expectations. We are resourceful.

We're just like you were when you were our age: young, excited, & full of life!

So pray for us. Pray with us. Build relationships with us if you want to, and we'll be way more likely to listen to you. Buy us a cup of $2.00 coffee during finals week and we'll love you forever. Love us. Be patient with us. We're still learning just like you were once.